Okay, who all watched TLC’s “Say Yes to the Dress – Bridesmaids” last night? http://press.discovery.com/us/tlc/programs/say-yes-dress-bridesmaids/
Admit it, I know you’re out there.
My husband and I watched together. (He’s great for indulging my need to watch TLC on Friday night’s when I know the last thing in the world he wants to see is wedding gown drama. I consider it required industry training. ) He was nothing short of horrified at the selfish, bitchy drama queens in these bridal parties. I know they were portrayed in the worst possible light but even TLC needs something to base a story line on. This blog post has been brewing ever since.
Rules for being a bridesmaid:
1. It’s not your wedding! Helpful suggestions, yes. Tantrums and ultimatums, NO NO NO.
2. Your primary job is to make the bride’s life easier. Wedding planning is stressful. Adding to that stress is a huge no no. See rule #1.
3. You will have to spend some money. Generally on the gown, make-up, shoes, travel costs if there are any, bridal shower, staggette and wedding gift for the couple. If this is going to be a major issue for your budget, opt out now.
4. You may not like the gown, shoes, fellow bridesmaids, theme, the groomsman you are ‘matched with’ or a hundred other choices the bridal couple makes. I don’t care. See rule #1.
There are a million other things I can add to this list. But these are the big ones.
Being asked to be a member of a bridal party is both an honour and an obligation. When a friend, sister, sorority mate, total random stranger, whomever asks you to be a member of her wedding party you are allowed to say ‘No’. If you are going to have difficulty with any of the rules, please say no. The bride will feel your stress and that breaks rule #2 right out the gate.
If you say yes, and then discover there is no way you can fulfill your commitment, please let your bride know BEFORE the gowns are ordered. I’ve had calls from moms “A bridesmaid backed out, the wedding is in 3 weeks, we need a dress for her replacement!”
Being such an important part of someone’s special day can be a total blast. The pampering, the limo ride, the professional photos of you looking fantastic, the party and so on. With the right attitude, and the right bride, everyone can have a memorable time.
On that note, what does a bride need to know about her bridesmaids? See part 2 . . .